What if?
I was speaking with someone yesterday and they brought up the fact that the way things are right now, I should just pack up and head back east to hang out back in the mid-atlantic area. So what if I did that? I suppose that it’s been giving me some serious stuff to think about.
First, what about saving face? I came out here to try something new. Yes, the economy sucks majorly and I’m still looking for work, but right now it always seems that I’m making some really bad decisions. Looking back, I probably should have stuck it out in DC and perhaps probably gone to another company instead of shipping out. Either that or spend a couple of weeks out here in San Francisco and look for what I’m interested in here rather than giving up a cushy job in DC. Yes, I liked working in DC, but there were some “downsides” of being there. I think the bug of being in SF had greater appeal and I was hoping that I’d have a better chance of getting a job.
I think I seriously had a swelled head…here I am thinking that with my qualifications and experience, I’d be able to get a job in any company. The economy was a major blow but then again, the people who are looking at my resume are simply not responding. Maybe I’m just not connected…seeing that it’s taken me nearly two years in DC just to meet a few people and for them to notice me and take my knowledge and insights seriously.
What if I left San Francisco to go back to DC? Well I’m sure that I’d have some essence of job security and snag up a job with some of my connections/networks, but I’d again fear that I’ve quit and given up on trying to become something in San Francisco…and I’m not ready for that. I told myself and other people that if I didn’t get a job soon, that I’d go work at Border’s or Best Buy or some place like that. I’m not sure what’s going on with that. I’d like to think that I’m not making empty promises or something like that.
Here’s some interesting scenarios that I was thinking about:
- What if I left SF and decided to simply spend my money and go traveling to different conferences without a care in the world? Answer: I’d probably be broke & homeless.
- What if I stayed in SF and booked my trips to go to different conferences and traveled back and forth to wherever I wanted? Answer: I’d be broke and would never get a job that I wanted.
I swear that I’m way too analytical and am thinking this out too much. I don’t know…there’s a lot of “what ifs”. I think I need to think this out some more…I’m hitting a slump or something.
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